From Andy Borowitz at The New Yorker:

WASHINGTON (
The Borowitz Report)—Faced
with a barrage of new questions about the Affordable Care Act,
President Obama cut short a White House press conference today, telling
the stunned press corps, “You know what? Everybody can keep their damn
insurance.”
Glaring at the reporters, the President continued, “You heard me. If
your insurance is crappy, then you just go ahead and keep it—the
crappier, the better. Let’s pretend this whole thing never happened.”
A vein in his forehead visibly throbbing, the President added, “You
know, I really wish I hadn’t spent the last three years of my life on
this thing. I should’ve just gone around invading countries for no
reason. That would’ve made everybody happy. Well, live and learn.”
As the reporters averted their eyes from the President, many of them
looking awkwardly at their shoes, he concluded his remarks: “All those
people out there who want to repeal Obamacare? Well, guess what: I’ll
make their day and repeal it myself. Really, it’s my pleasure. But I
swear that this is the last time I try to do something nice for
anybody.”
I just visited healthcare.gov. It is working fine and the prices I checked for health insurance were spectacular.
My Man, Barry, has really and truly done IT.